Homeward bound

My mom asked if I would make a post tonight,  I'm not going to lie, this has been a really hard last couple of days.  We had a meeting today with all of Dads Drs,  they still do not know what Dad has officially, but they do know that his brain has atrophied, which means that is has shrunk,  they believe the lack of moving is because of brain damage, due to viral encephalitis or a time he was without oxygen to long, when he was having trouble breathing.  Either way, they said the damage is permanent and that if he were to survive the infection in his brain, he would never be able to move again, and probably be on the ventilator the rest of his life.

Many of you know my Dad and he has expressed a number of times to all of us that we would never want to live a life on a machine.  Due to this news, we as a family have decided to turn off the ventilator tomorrow morning and let him pass.   Please keep us in your prayers tomorrow especially, and my mom has asked that we all pray for him to pass quickly and peacefully.

A few years ago, after my Dads younger brother died, he found a song that he wanted sung at his funeral, it is called homeward bound, and there is a part in that song that says, " set me free to find my calling, and I'll return to you somehow" he asked us to change the words to, "set me free to find my brother, and I'll return to you somehow"  so this song will be sung at his funeral.

My mom says this is what she is doing, it is what he would want.  She is "setting him free"

Please know that we are so grateful for all your prayers and fasting over the last couple of months, they have meant so much to us, our testimonies of the truthfulness of the Gospel has been strengthened by your kind words and deeds.  We know this hard time is for a "Glorious Purpose" as told to us by a dear family member.  We also know that sometimes when we pray for things the answer is sometimes, no...  as in this case, and we also know that he will receive his full health and strength after he dies, we  know that we will see him again. We will forever be grateful for this knowledge, and for a loving Heavenly Father and older brother Jesus Christ who knows what we are experiencing at this time and will be there for us help us get through it. 

Sharred missionary letter

Since I have cryed a bucket of tears already writting this letter to my son I couldn't write again the same things so I have decided to just send you his letter letting you know what is going on with your dear Bishop and our family.  I know he loves you all, his ward family, his friends in and out of the ward.  So here is the letter:

Dear Josh,

     As you know your Dad's situation.  I know your mission Pres. is going to talk to you as we called him last night after our family meeting.  Right after we finished talking your Uncle Eric texted me this message: " You are never far from my thoughts or prayers.  Last night Jolynne and I were in the temple. We had a long wait in the chapel.  I was thinking about Randy of course.  The veil is pretty thin for me these days.  Here are the words I heard. "Eric, your prayers have been heard.  His life is in my hands."  I don't really know what that means for sure but I know that God is looking out for Randy".  I also know this is true.  As your Dad gets more serious and he gets more complications from being bed ridden so long, I have been wondering if I am being selfish about  praying him here when maybe it is Gods will that he be with him.  There are tons of people praying for him and putting his name in the temple and fasting for him. They have had faith for his healing in his behalf.  When really we should have faith that the Lord will do what is best for us.  Weither it is healing or letting us pass into his arms.  I DO know God in in charge!  Of the little things and the BIG things.  We still have to have faith that he is right, and continue in faith no matter what the consequesces.  I know that what you are doing, serving a mission, is the right thing for you. You are doing so good. I am so proud of you and I know your Dad is too. Your Dad may pull through this, I don't know yet, but I am willing to let him go if it is God's will.  So as a family last night we agreed that we should take the "Fully resisatate" notice off his charts, and instead put on "Do not resisatate" on instead.  That way if the Lord wants to take him, we will let him go and not try to do CPR and bring him back. I know your Dad wouldn't want to live his life in a bed, unable to move or do anything for himself.  

     I will continue to pray for you.  This is a once in a lifetime experience for you where you can serve others and the Lord full time.  Dad said serving as a Bishop was the closest thing to a mission, because he could serve the Lord,  almost,  full time. It was a blessing in his life, like your mission can be.  Don't waste your time, serve with all your heart.  Your family (which you have a great one) is all concerned over you and is praying for you. We all love you.  

Love,  Mom

May I also say that I appreciate all the support and prayers you have given to me.  And I also ask that you again change your prayers that Randy will be healed only if it be thy will be done.  We need to put this in the Lords hands, and trust in him. Because really,  His life is in his hands, just like it is for everyone who lives on this earth at this time. Bless you and thank you. 

EMG

Today Randy had a EMG.  This monitors how the nerves function in your brain.  It also shows how your nerves function in your mylon sheaths surrounding the muscles.  They found out yesterday that Randy's mylon sheaths around his muscles work fine.  But the nerve impulses from his brain are not firing right.  That proves he has not got Gillian Berre or Brickerstaff.  His MRI showed abnormalities in his brain stem and they are trying to figure out why.  So his brain is not telling his muscles to work.  They also got one result that said he doesn't have one type of West Nile Virus.

Sorry so short but I've got to head up to the hospital.

It's a good day to have a good day

   " It's a good day to have a good day."  
      I got this advice in a letter the ward sent me from the ward Halloween party.  I don't know who wrote it but it is now posted on my fridge.  Even with all that is happening it is still a good day to have a good day.  I have been extremely blessed, mainly with the gospel and the perspective it gives to me. No matter what happens, this 9 weeks is only a small blip in the eternal scheme of things.  I know where I am going, and where I come from, and who I will be with, because of temple blessings I have recieved.  So it is a good day to have a good day.  I remember this!
   They are still doing more testing.  They did a CT scan of his chest all the way to his toes.  They found fluid in his right lung and they also found some clots and an absess.  So they put a drain in the absess. They also are doing a lung treatment that is kinda like blowing up a baloon.  They put pressure in and out like taking deep breaths.  Then they suction him out.. It is working great and they are loosening up a lot of secretions.  They also found clots in his legs.  They think when he was having a hard time breathing this last week at the L tack, and we were thinking he was having seisures that his clots were probably moving into his lungs. They have started him on a treatment of higher doses of heprin.
     We have gotten the results from the EEG.  He is not having seisures.  So that is good. We are still waiting on the results of his other tests and then the Dr.s will all get together and try to figure things out and try to see what he really has.
      I had Lisa and Kati up at the hospital today and it was a pretty wet day.  If one of us starts crying then it triggers the rest of us.  But we also had some pretty lively conversations and we were laughing a bunch too.
     Thanks for all your prayers and support.  I don't know how I am coping some days and I sure suspect it is from your prayers that is helping me get through this.  Thanks, love to all.
                   

The U

     There has been continuous testing since Randy has been at the U.  I have talked to so many Dr.s. Neurologists, Infectious disease Dr.s. etc.  They all agree that Randy didn't have Guillon Berre or Brickerstaff because he would have improved by now and he isn't.  It is a mistery.  Three Dr's that came in today and talked to me said they will have to go home and do some more homework.
     He has been totally sleeping all day because I think he is exhausted from the move and from all the tests.  Here is a picture of him getting an EEG test that tests his brain waves.   They do it continually except when he has to get moved to do other tests.

Doesn't he look like he is becoming part of the borg off star trek?!?

It's a little easier knowing that he is in the best hands!  thank you for all of the prayers! they are very necessary and very much appreciated!

Moving Day

     Today is moving day.  Randy is being transfered to the University of Utah Hospital.  On Sunday as I was leaving for church his Dr. came in.  Before that I was prompted to call my brother in law and talk to him about Randy's condition.  He suggested that since he has not had any improvement since the Plasma treatment then they should look to other areas and suggested additional tests that could be done.  Then he agreed to talk with the Dr when he came in.  So I called him and they visited and he said he couldn't do that intense of test while he was here.  Hense, he is being moved.  He has to go outside of "Network" so that is way more money but there is a chance that since "In network" can't do these tests they will make an exception, if the Dr. verifies it and they approve it.  So I am asking that you keep in your prayers Humana Insurance Co and Randy.  I know prayers work.  It is a miracle that he is even getting more testing at this time.  I appreciate you so much.  Keep up the good work!

Faith and Works

     Sorry I haven't updated you on this blog.  Things are about the same, there are no new treatments they are trying, so there is not much to tell.  There are a few things that I will tell you about though.
     We have a daughter, Trisha, who has been praying and fasting for her Dad, as I am sure you are.  When there seems to be no miracles after so much fasting and prayer she was getting discouraged.  She was asking,  " What good is my faith when it doesn't seem to be working?"  As she was reading her scriptures she read in Ether 12:12  "For if there be no faith among the children of men God can do no miracle among them; wherefore, he showed not himself until after their faith."  The thing we have to remember is that this trial is on the Lord's timetable, not ours.  We must continue in faith, as we have been promised.
     There are also some interesting things we have been trying.  Since the Dr.s are at a loss of what to do further to help Randy I decided to try some new things.  I got permission from his Dr to try some essential oils.  With the help of the Lindleys, who know way more about them than I do, I started using some of them on Friday.  I put them on  different times during the day.  The nurses didn't like it and complained.  One said she got migranes if she was in the room with the smell, she didn't come in after that, but that's ok.  On Sat. when I went in he had his eyes open.  Not for just an hour either, it was all morning until about noon.  He actually looked like he was looking at me.  His lungs sound better and he doesn't have as much mucus that they have to suction out.  This is the longest he has had his eyes open so far.  We will see if it's the same today.  I am using oil for respiratory and the nervous system on him.
     Lisa is also doing research that is telling of another treatment that has been used to help Gillian Barre patients who don't get results from the 2 treatments that usually work.  Randy has already had both of them and they didn't really work on him either.  I am going to ask the Dr about it when I see him.   It is treating them with steroids.  There have been good results on some patients with these.
     Also the EEG that they sent over was on the wrong patient.  When they figured that out and sent the right one it was still good news.  He still was not having seisures, but the brain waves were slow, not normal.  This is normal for when you are sick and in a sedate or sleeping mode, which Randy is.
     I believe that the Lord expects us to do our part when trying to help the sick.  We are continuing to do our best to care for Randy, and we are expecting miracles on his part and enduring to the end, whenever that is.
    Thank you for continuing to pray and fast for him.  We appreciate it more than you know.